18th birthday party - One of the guests turned up with a failed attempt at making a huge werther's originals wrapped up in cling foil. As a consequence, I ended up with a plate full of melted werther's in my freezer.
Sometime after 18th birthday party - Sent round an e-mail asking if anybody had any idea what I could do with a plate of melted werther's for my website. Lots of suggestions came back(some of which I should probably put on the uses page):-
"Stick it in an egg and call it Really Silly
Putty"
"Pour it over vanilla ice-cream as a delicious werther's-type topping
"
"Apply to the skin of one's lover and lick off for some erotic fun"
"Use
as part of a practical joke against friends or family"
"Package it in small
jars and sell it at extortionate prices as Trebors Special Preserve"
"Use as
fertiliser for a pot plant"
"Grow fungi on it."
"Send it through the post
(preferably to an address that doesn't exists, try 'Dead, Address unknown.')
"
"Lubrication of axels and such like on your car."
"Make a Lava Lamp?
Make Ice lollies? Ice cream sauce? Make a werther's Creme carmel? Make a Baileys
style drink? Add hot water to make a werther's drink? "
"Sell it to a hard-up
horrror B-movie producer who needs a monster for his latest film."
"Sell it
as a chemical weapon"
"Eat it"
"Insert it into your floppy disk drive and
then connect to the internet, allowing it to morth onto the world wide web and
begin sticking everything to it, soon all of the crap will be stuck to it and
you can then extract it through your normal telephone, covered in what I will
now term inter-crap, and all that will be left on the net are my site and yours,
and that is all anyone can look at, thus allowing us the chance to become
billionaires through advertising and eventually selling our sites"
"Make a
werther's coin from the plate and carve yourself into it"
"Edible frisby -
entertainment until lunchtime!"
"Sunhat"
"Hub cap"
"I suppose it really depends
what kind of shape the werther's are melted into but you could use it as
a wall decoration, or a base for a sun dial, or even a clock that only tells the
right time once a day (ie. draw a clock face on it), or you could sit on it
untill it hatches to reveal that it is infact a cunningly disguised Velociraptor
egg, or you could find it's resonant frequency at which point it will explode in
a shower of pure energy and super charge, with powers of tasting like werther's
when people lick you and total sweetness, or you could talk to it and teach it
language skills and about all of the cultures of the world until it eventually
becomes world ambassador and accomplishes world peace, but then once all of the
weapons have been destroyed, it will summon it's fleets from the galactic Ether
whom have been searching for a home for twelve milennia, and they will then
exterminate the now peace loving humans, take over the planet and become the
dominant species in the cosmos, or you could spare millions all this suffering
and throw it in the bin. "
6 months later - Having done none of the above suggestions(though to be fair - most of them weren't exactly pratical), 6 months later, took it out of the freezer at a party, half of it got eaten, rest was thrown away.
And so ends the story of the plate of melted werther's....